Once Upon a Time in Remission

 

“The honorable limbs of body,

Pharmaceutical companies,

Insurance companies,

Dearest physicians,

Hereby I declare

We have gone to remission

Hereby I request

Your sincere endeavor

In the direction of resilience.

 

Hereby I announce

The evil spirit is gone

It is buried alive somewhere

Out of my soul and mind

It can no longer mess

With my studies and my job

It cannot question

The purpose of my life

 

Dear Brain,

Let me be free of stress 

Do not command another attack

Please, some Serotonin instead.

 

Dear Ears,

You may stop listening

To this delusion: “What if?”

No ifs, ands, or buts

Nothing will happen.

Relief!

 

Dear Face, Dear Fingers,

You may stay in shape

Do not swell

Be well.

 

Dear Heart,

You may now retire from your race

Stay calm and Adrenalin free

There are no threats

 

Dear Liver and Kidneys, 

You have my appreciation

For overtime and patience

Good job! God bless.

 

Dear Stomach,

Good news. You can have anything you desire

Coffee, corn, fried food, chocolate, and pepper

Though better to avoid them forever

 

Oh, My Poor Colon

My darling Descending one

My beloved Sigmoid

Thank you for your resistance

For tolerating the ulcers, the pains

The bloating and cramps. Well-done!

You deserve the noble peace prize

Or the medical one.

 

Oh, My Bad Back,

Whenever UC flares up you act up

With your Sacralization of L5-S1

You may rest from your competition and lay back

 

Dear Womb,

You will be the only one to menstruate

You will have no other rival

Keep your bloody head up

 

Dear Blood,

You will be back to normal

Clean and bright

Rich with hemoglobin

I promise.

 

Dear Legs,

Do not play restless

Stand, dance, and run

The fucking fatigue is gone.

 

Dearest Immune System,

Stop this foolish game of chess

With my lymphocytes; Behave yourself

Or I will have to suppress

Your immunity.

 

Oh, Malignant Genes,

What do you want from me?

I beg you to leave. Let me be.

Let us maintain our healthy community

 

Azacols,

You are just Placebos, or sugar pills

3x 800 mgs? What a ridiculous math

Who cares? Be vitamins

 

Pharmaceutical Company,

I know you don’t care

I know it’s all about money

But what can I say

You never go out of business

You cure one but create a side effect

 

Insurance company,

I wish I could say

Go and fuck yourself

But we have an unfinished business

 

My Dearest Dr. K.......,

You are nice and friendly

You know Persian and have empathy

You are lovely; you are an artist

You are the best colonoscopist

It is every patient’s dream to turn her back

And leave her butt at your hands

But you are dismissed

Once in a while

I will pay you a visit

For a chat and possibly tea

 

Today UC left my mind

I forgot the first day

The toilet was a cup of blood

I do not think about it

UC is gone.

You see?

I am well

I am fine.”